Key Takeaways
- Money is a common source of arguments for many couples.
- Whether you combine all, some, or none of your money doesn’t really matter.
- Keeping clear communication and being open about expenses are key.
Po-tay-to, po-tah-to, to-may-to, to-mah-to…they mean the same thing, they just sound different. You may disagree with your spouse or partner about this, but a much more likely source of arguments for couples is the topic of money.
It’s very common for couples to argue about money. There’s “my money,” “your money,” and “our money” in any relationship. In some cases, those categories are very defined; in others, it’s more blurred so that it’s mostly “our money.” Is one way better than another? Probably not. What’s important is that the couple is in agreement about how they want to handle their money.
What’s not good is keeping things secretive or separating money for reasons that are not in the joint interests of the couple. That sort of thing can cause real problems in relationships. One person may have a gambling addiction or a shopping addiction, and they’re keeping things separate because they want to hide their addiction.
Some couples may keep separate accounts, pay separate bills, and only combine their money for joint expenses. That’s fine. Others may decide to combine most of their money, but have smaller separate accounts for discretionary spending. That’s fine too. And then there are couples who combine everything. Of course, that’s fine as well.
The big issue is to ensure that both people are very clear about expectations and know what the overall expenses are. Trouble starts when one’s caught short when it comes time to pay expenses, or when overspending occurs, or when a separate habit is being fed that the other partner doesn’t know about.
There’s no one correct way to go about combining or separating money – whatever works for you and your significant other, as long as you both agree, is what’s right for you. Just be open and upfront about your spending and expenses, and it’ll save you from arguing about that down the road. Now, how to pronounce “tomato” and “potato” is another story. Until next time, enjoy.
Gary
If you’d like to read more on this topic, here are a few of Gary’s previous posts that you might enjoy:
